expectations

I try too hard.

Last night I had an opportunity to play with my camera some more.  But the play only lasted for a little while.  Whether I wanted to admit it or not (and I didn't), I started competing.  Instead of taking pictures that I can appreciate personally I started trying to take pictures that certain other people would be impressed by.  The result is that far too many of the hundreds of shots I took are ones that I am unsatisfied with.  The same thing occurs with all my artistic endeavors.

Recognition of my talent is something that I crave more than I would like to admit.  I want people to love what I do as much as I do.  The irony is that the more I focus on that, the less I love what I create.  Expectations must be abandoned; other people must vanish from the mind; passion must be unleashed; all other thoughts must be pushed aside.  Otherwise I misuse the gift that God has given me.